Single Parenting: You Have the Ultimate Covering
For many single parents there can be a lot of deeply hidden emotions in the heart of mom or dad. These hidden emotions stem from their child (children) not having the other parent in his/ her life (or home). The emotions can sometimes include a deep sense of guilt for “doing this” to your child (children), secret shame or feelings of failure for not being able to “give” your child (children) what you “feel” is the “perfect” family. The emotions can also be possessing false fear that the life of your child (children) will not turn out “right”, feeling somewhat inadequate that you don’t have a second half to help you in the journey of raising your child (children), self-pity because you have to “go it alone” …and in some cases even envy – wishing you had what you “perceive” as that “solid” husband or wife you see others with. Deep down inside your heart is broken.
So on this journey to help equip you in the parenting you (the single parent) tap into Christian and other family and parenting resources for encouragement & support. Although the intention behind these resources is meant for good sometimes …just sometimes it stings to read or hear that “kids in single parent homes lack”, “kids of single parent families have (or will have) problems in certain areas because they don’t have a father (male figure) or mother (female figure) in their life”, “kids of single parent homes don’t have the optimum circumstances” or “that there isn’t balance in the life of a child raised in a single parent home”. I don’t dismiss the need for both dad & mom to be in the home raising their child together as this is how God designed the family to be. However in my opinion hearing or reading what sometimes seems like an endless list of hopeless commentaries only stokes the fire of negative emotions (previously mentioned) in a single parent’s heart. When stoked this creates a false burden on the parent to “find” a spouse or a parent figure for their child (children). This false burden is rooted in fear and will not result in rational decision making “in looking” for a mate. Single parents it’s better to look up and tap into Jesus Christ instead.
The Bible is truth. The word of God says “I want you to know and realize that Christ is the Head of every man, the head of a woman is her husband, and the Head of Christ is God” (1 Corinthians 11:3). When we read the scripture it very obvious that the Lord has created for the home. If we further dissect the passage we can also see His allotment of unfailing grace and mercy. If the man (husband) or the woman (wife) is removed is Christ still at the head? Is God still at the head? Is the covering of God – His strength, wisdom, provision, love, peace, kindness, etc. removed from you and your family because the husband (father) or wife (mother) isn’t in the picture? With or without a spouse God is still there with you and your family. God is gracious! The King of Kings and Lord of Lord is the ultimate covering so look to Him because He is directly covering you!
Yes, we live in a fallen world (i.e. divorce rates, children being born out of wedlock, absentee/ dead beat parents, etc.) but in all of this God’s love, grace, and mercy through Christ Jesus still abounds …and abounds even more (Romans 5:20). For you and your family His name is Jehovah-Jireh (The Lord your Provider), Jehovah-Rapha (The Lord your Helper), Jehovah-Shalom (The Lord your Peace), and Jehovah-Rohi (The Lord your Shepherd). He is with you! He is with your child (children)! He’s covering your family and promises to never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).
Single mom/ dad don’t lose heart instead get rid of those hidden emotions because they’re not of God and will only take you somewhere you don’t want to go. Hold on to the promises of the ultimate Father. ”The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will quite you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing” Zephaniah 3:17. Pursue a love relationship with Him at all cost! Rejoice in the Father (your Husband) at all times because He calls you His bride (Isaiah 54:5)! Go into God by developing a deeper love relationship with Him and let your child (children) see you in endless the pursuit of The Father through Christ Jesus.
If you seek Him with all your heart not only will you find Him but your child (children) will also (Jeremiah 29:13). Remember Timothy? He grew into the Lord and became a solid servant of God because his mother Eunice and grandmother Lois modeled a sincere relationship with and devotion to the Lord (2 Timothy 1:5). Be like that mother & grandmother and keep growing in your relationship with Jesus Christ. Let your child (children) see that God alone is your dependency and sufficiency. Always be consistent in redirecting your child (children) to the Father and Holy Spirit will meet them where they are. It is He (and He alone) who will teach and show your child( children) how to be Godly men and women (i.e. becoming new creations in Christ Jesus – 2 Corinthians 5:17, putting off the old man – Colossians 3:10, and possessing the mind of Christ 2 Corinthians 2:16).
His promises are true. He knows your heart …you need only to “delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” Psalm 37:4.